Aloha, everyone I have posted my first fanfic on ff.net I'd love to hear what you think about it I'm going to continue writing it and hopefully I'll get better. I have already seen a couple holes in my story haha bad proof reading I guess. Well I'm going to try and fix that in the next chapter or completely revamp the first chapter before posting the second. I will be writing a lot of fanfiction this summer cause I'm lazy and no more work. This first chapter took 3 hours to write maybe (was being slow). I have other ones which I think are a lot better saved on my comp but for some reason this felt like the one I should post on my new account (lost my old password lol). With out further delay READS IT! Subjugated

I'm double posting I'm a bad person! I'm sorry really just my thread died since I posted it when no one was on but I have posted the second chapter of my story! read if you like

I like the plot and the idea, you just need to take your time with it. The chapters seems a bit rushed.
Other than that, i like it!