It's only rated K+, but I like it...what about you? Tell me what you think. Here's the link. The New Adventures of Team 7!
A story.
Started by Vivi, Jul 01 2006 06:14 PM
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6 replies to this topic
#1
Vivi
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- Chakra Water Walker
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Dr. Snakes
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Posted 01 July 2006 - 06:14 PM
#2
Random Nobody
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- Chakra Water Walker
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Don't Touch the Flag!
- Location:Nobody Knows! (I know really bad joke)
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Posted 01 July 2006 - 06:31 PM
I didn't like it to much. Theres too much of a chance for this to just become another Mary Sue story. For one, the main character Shori shares the name with the author, and that's never a good sign. Then she swaps places with Sakura who seems to be non existant in this fic. Plus she has an "angsty" background that mixes Sasuke and Sakura's with a mysterious family disapperance that will probably result in her gaining some incredibly unrealistic bloodline ability later, like the ability to copy other bloodlines, or the ability to just have every single bloodline at once.
Of course I could be wrong and it could become a decent story, but as of right now I don't really like it. Chapters are too short, explanations and development are only given glances (was that paragraph saying she befriened Ino then was picked on by Ino because of the Sasuke fanclubs influence even neccesary?), and she's replaced my favorite kunoichi. Not exactly a recipee for success if you ask me.
Of course I could be wrong and it could become a decent story, but as of right now I don't really like it. Chapters are too short, explanations and development are only given glances (was that paragraph saying she befriened Ino then was picked on by Ino because of the Sasuke fanclubs influence even neccesary?), and she's replaced my favorite kunoichi. Not exactly a recipee for success if you ask me.
#3
gamerman_007
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- Special Jounin
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Shodaime Smexkage
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Posted 01 July 2006 - 06:53 PM
Too short, and where the hell is sakura?
That is all.
That is all.
Bunny: Sasuke, join me.
Sasuke: What will I receive if I join you?
Bunny: POWER! UNLIMITED POWER!
Sasuke: Sweet! what do I do?
Orochimaru: Sssssssssssssaaaaaaasssssssssukkkkkkeeeeeee-kkkuuuuuunnnn!
Sasuke: oh f***
Sono nantomo ienai sekushii na oshiri wo ore no kokan ni okittensukete rizumu ni awasete kosurinasai = Back that ass up.
#4
Vivi
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- Chakra Water Walker
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Dr. Snakes
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Posted 01 July 2006 - 06:54 PM
The author decided to delete the story....Arigatou for answering, though.
#5
Danni
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- Examiner
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..life..hard
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Posted 02 July 2006 - 10:34 PM
WHY did he delete it, It WAS getting really good.
I be there in 2 months YAAY!
#6
Vivi
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- Chakra Water Walker
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- 388 posts
Dr. Snakes
- Gender:Female
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Posted 06 July 2006 - 06:46 AM
She. I really don't know why.
#7
Vespar
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- Elite Teacher
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Namikage
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- Interests:Everyone thinks it, but etiquette interferes; lest the writer is construed as misdirected.
Posted 06 July 2006 - 07:44 AM
Drat, I didn't even get to see it.
But judging from the above, the author probably took it down from the reviews they got. They really shouldn't take criticism to heart. Honestly, it's difficult when someone wants to share something but don't have much experience at writing -especially when there isn't enough encouragement, nor is there someone to look over their shoulder and give them tips.
Heck, if I ever found that who that author was, I'd be willing to give them tips for writing. That is, if they are willing to receive it.
But judging from the above, the author probably took it down from the reviews they got. They really shouldn't take criticism to heart. Honestly, it's difficult when someone wants to share something but don't have much experience at writing -especially when there isn't enough encouragement, nor is there someone to look over their shoulder and give them tips.
Heck, if I ever found that who that author was, I'd be willing to give them tips for writing. That is, if they are willing to receive it.
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