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So.... What Did I Do Wrong?


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#21 harry4e

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Posted 16 November 2014 - 04:13 AM

The movie ended and we both started doing our own things. She started reading a book she had brought along, and I want back to my room and started to play some video games.

 

Um....I'm not much into this dating thing, but the fact you went and did your own thing when your were both still technically on a date sounds really odd to me, have things changed that much in recent times that this would be considered normal?

 

I'd only leave my date to her own devices like that if we had been dating for a while. In fact I wouldn't even be comfortable leaving anyone who I don't know that well to their own devices at my place period. My parents always drilled it into my head that you always keep guests company.

 

Ofcourse it is possible, that while you were busy playing games, she had a snoop around and found your porn stash or something, but the fact you ignored your date to play computer games sounds like a big no no to me. If you were done with your date why didn't you offer to walk her home or something?


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#22 narusaku256

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Posted 16 November 2014 - 09:33 AM

Jeeeezzzzz I don't understand girls at all -_-

Math and Calculus sound easier than this -_-

(No offence, anyone XD)

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#23 DJSparty

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 05:53 AM

Jeeeezzzzz I don't understand girls at all -_-

Math and Calculus sound easier than this -_-

(No offence, anyone XD)

Lol trust me when I say they are easier....

 

I lived with 4 girls while in college for a year and a half lmao. Taught me a lot but at the same time I still will never 100% understand the female species. 

 

Girls have a tendency to think and lead with their emotions and how they are particularly feeling at that moment. Us guys love facts, and being logical, that's why we have a hard time reading what a girl want/expect us to do without being explicitly told. It's something you kind of learn more about when you're more exposed to women in general. You get a better feeling for what they are thinking but you can never be quite sure. Best way to learn is by experience.



#24 narusaku256

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 06:54 AM

Lol trust me when I say they are easier....
 
I lived with 4 girls while in college for a year and a half lmao. Taught me a lot but at the same time I still will never 100% understand the female species. 
 
Girls have a tendency to think and lead with their emotions and how they are particularly feeling at that moment. Us guys love facts, and being logical, that's why we have a hard time reading what a girl want/expect us to do without being explicitly told. It's something you kind of learn more about when you're more exposed to women in general. You get a better feeling for what they are thinking but you can never be quite sure. Best way to learn is by experience.

Why not just say what you actually want instead of all those hints, signs and what not -_-

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#25 Dalton.T.R

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 07:41 AM

I find it strange how a lot of people here are saying I did everything wrong when pretty much everyone I know personally is telling me it wasn't me at all. Yeah...I guess I can now officially say I've dated a crazy chick...okay...

 

 

 

I think I'm done with relationships for a while... can't say I was ever that social in the first place...

 

Some of you, I'm sure, are thinking "Wow...this guy's an idiot. Everyone knows what they're supposed to do on a date."

 

First of all...HEY! Secondly...you are absolutely 100% correct. But here's the thing... I never had any friends when I was growing up. The 'friends' I did have were people who only needed me every now and again because I was really good or knowledgeable at something, or people who just left me without ever saying good-bye. I was bullied to a point where I attempted to end my own life several different times. Every time I tried to make friends, people would just tell me to go away and bug someone else. So I never got a lot of 'experience' with what one is supposed to do around friends.

 

Even now I still feel deeply depressed. Not a day goes by that I wonder what it'd be like to be invited to hang out with people at their houses and play games, watch movies, or do whatever else people do when they hang out. If something were to go wrong at work and I got killed, who other than my family and some friends of my parents' would show up at my funeral, or who would visit me in the hospital were I to survive?

 

I want to make friends...but I just feel like every time I make some, the friendship lasts for about a week and then they turn their backs on me...

 

 

Also...when someone says they want to be left alone...that usually means they want you out of the room...since everyone seems to think I just left my date because she pulled out a book. No, she asked me if I could be quiet while she read. But I'm the disrespectful one apparently... What was I supposed to do? Sit in my chair hardly breathing for a half hour?


Edited by Let's Dig, 18 November 2014 - 07:49 AM.


#26 narusaku256

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 08:08 AM

I find it strange how a lot of people here are saying I did everything wrong when pretty much everyone I know personally is telling me it wasn't me at all. Yeah...I guess I can now officially say I've dated a crazy chick...okay...
 
 
I think I'm done with relationships for a while... can't say I was ever that social in the first place...
 
Some of you, I'm sure, are thinking "Wow...this guy's an idiot. Everyone knows what they're supposed to do on a date."
 
First of all...HEY! Secondly...you are absolutely 100% correct. But here's the thing... I never had any friends when I was growing up. The 'friends' I did have were people who only needed me every now and again because I was really good or knowledgeable at something, or people who just left me without ever saying good-bye. I was bullied to a point where I attempted to end my own life several different times. Every time I tried to make friends, people would just tell me to go away and bug someone else. So I never got a lot of 'experience' with what one is supposed to do around friends.
 
Even now I still feel deeply depressed. Not a day goes by that I wonder what it'd be like to be invited to hang out with people at their houses and play games, watch movies, or do whatever else people do when they hang out. If something were to go wrong at work and I got killed, who other than my family and some friends of my parents' would show up at my funeral, or who would visit me in the hospital were I to survive?
 
I want to make friends...but I just feel like every time I make some, the friendship lasts for about a week and then they turn their backs on me...
 
 
Also...when someone says they want to be left alone...that usually means they want you out of the room...since everyone seems to think I just left my date because she pulled out a book. No, she asked me if I could be quiet while she read. But I'm the disrespectful one apparently...

Know what dude? Leave that girl....she does not deserve to be with you and never loved you in the first place. Why tell everyone a different story? And worst of all....why take things down to the rock bottom? I say leave her....forget this and start a fresh. Stay away from relationships FOR SOMETIME if you want to. To hell with people! Do what you feel is right. Do what you think gives you inner peace. Do what you think makes you happy. But at the same time...know that there are other people around you as well. It should not affect them. If that girl loved you....she'd appreciate and reciprocate slightest of your efforts. There are no 'conditions to be followed' in love. Things just....happen, naturally! And whatever the case, if both of them really love each other....then even a boring date is fun just cuz you get time to spend with each other. Believe me when I say this. I have been on dates wherein we actually did nothing apart from having a long walk or going on a drive and just plain chatting....and it has turned out to be the best time ever spent with each other! No movies, no games just plain drive or a walk...and plain chatting on the way and opening up! If I were you I'd just say 'Sorry' and be done with her. Nothing whatsoever. Yeah! Sorry for nothing....because there'd be a difference between her and me. I'd know I am a better man and just sorry and its done! Chapter close! Not all girls are the same! You just need to meet the right ones! And believe me when you'll met em....all this negativity would be done for.

As for the latter part...you yourself never realise what you mean to other people. Or its that...you don't realise how much you mean to other people.

Open yourself up to the universe and it will open up to you....

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#27 Lady_duckish

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 09:34 AM

Why not just say what you actually want instead of all those hints, signs and what not -_-

Trust me, there are plenty of women out there who do just that.The key to any successful relationship is communication. If you're wasting time with all these vague signals and hints, you're asking for unnecessary grief. That's true for romantic and platonic relationships. 

 

. A bit of empathy, common sense, and sensitivity? Yes. Mind reading? No, absolutely not. No  reasonable person is going to basically shew you away and then blast you when you give them what they want. Mind you she was comfortable and basically said she was excited about the book. He had no reason to press her or look deeper into what she wanted.She said she wanted to read. He was nice about her rude behavior and allowed her to read with zero fuss. 

 

I find it strange how a lot of people here are saying I did everything wrong when pretty much everyone I know personally is telling me it wasn't me at all. Yeah...I guess I can now officially say I've dated a crazy chick...okay...

 

 

 

I think I'm done with relationships for a while... can't say I was ever that social in the first place...

 

Some of you, I'm sure, are thinking "Wow...this guy's an idiot. Everyone knows what they're supposed to do on a date."

 

First of all...HEY! Secondly...you are absolutely 100% correct. But here's the thing... I never had any friends when I was growing up. The 'friends' I did have were people who only needed me every now and again because I was really good or knowledgeable at something, or people who just left me without ever saying good-bye. I was bullied to a point where I attempted to end my own life several different times. Every time I tried to make friends, people would just tell me to go away and bug someone else. So I never got a lot of 'experience' with what one is supposed to do around friends.

 

Even now I still feel deeply depressed. Not a day goes by that I wonder what it'd be like to be invited to hang out with people at their houses and play games, watch movies, or do whatever else people do when they hang out. If something were to go wrong at work and I got killed, who other than my family and some friends of my parents' would show up at my funeral, or who would visit me in the hospital were I to survive?

 

I want to make friends...but I just feel like every time I make some, the friendship lasts for about a week and then they turn their backs on me...

 

 

Also...when someone says they want to be left alone...that usually means they want you out of the room...since everyone seems to think I just left my date because she pulled out a book. No, she asked me if I could be quiet while she read. But I'm the disrespectful one apparently... What was I supposed to do? Sit in my chair hardly breathing for a half hour?

Try not to take it hard. Her friend probably told her she overreacted and was rude to you, and thats where this allergy nonsense came from, because she has no other excuse other than "i acted like a child".

 

Relationships do take work and there will be times the both of you have to read past what you see on the surface, but most people have been doing that for every  relationship they have ever had, romantic or otherwise. As you get to know that person it becomes easier. Still, dont accept blame for someone's inability to be honest about what they want. She blew up at you when getting your attention (which she pushed away) would have been as easy as coming in the room and sitting beside you. Now if she did that and you continued to play video games while she just stared into space (basically what she wanted you to do lol) then i could understand her being a little hurt ( not really seeing as she did that first but okk). 

 

I know this might sound strange because im just a few years older, but (assuming shes ur age) 20 is still really young and a lot of people are still getting comfortable with dating. That and we all mature at different rates. Maybe she did feel embarrassed that you didnt push her to put away her book, but still not your fault. Please dont let this turn you off being close with people. I believe even the most introverted or socially awkward person still craves meaningful relationships. Don't let this one bad experience (one which is fixable. after all, the time before they you guys were enjoying each other) keep you from dating and having friends. 


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#28 narusaku256

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 10:24 AM

Trust me, there are plenty of women out there who do just that.The key to any successful relationship is communication. If you're wasting time with all these vague signals and hints, you're asking for unnecessary grief. That's true for romantic and platonic relationships. 
 
. A bit of empathy, common sense, and sensitivity? Yes. Mind reading? No, absolutely not. No  reasonable person is going to basically shew you away and then blast you when you give them what they want. Mind you she was comfortable and basically said she was excited about the book. He had no reason to press her or look deeper into what she wanted.She said she wanted to read. He was nice about her rude behavior and allowed her to read with zero fuss. 
 
Try not to take it hard. Her friend probably told her she overreacted and was rude to you, and thats where this allergy nonsense came from, because she has no other excuse other than "i acted like a child".
 
Relationships do take work and there will be times the both of you have to read past what you see on the surface, but most people have been doing that for every  relationship they have ever had, romantic or otherwise. As you get to know that person it becomes easier. Still, dont accept blame for someone's inability to be honest about what they want. She blew up at you when getting your attention (which she pushed away) would have been as easy as coming in the room and sitting beside you. Now if she did that and you continued to play video games while she just stared into space (basically what she wanted you to do lol) then i could understand her being a little hurt ( not really seeing as she did that first but okk). 
 
I know this might sound strange because im just a few years older, but (assuming shes ur age) 20 is still really young and a lot of people are still getting comfortable with dating. That and we all mature at different rates. Maybe she did feel embarrassed that you didnt push her to put away her book, but still not your fault. Please dont let this turn you off being close with people. I believe even the most introverted or socially awkward person still craves meaningful relationships. Don't let this one bad experience (one which is fixable. after all, the time before they you guys were enjoying each other) keep you from dating and having friends. 

@Let's dig See? Not every girl's the same. Basically....THIS! What she said...

Edited by narusaku256, 18 November 2014 - 10:27 AM.

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#29 KonaKonaFan

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Posted 18 November 2014 - 02:46 PM

Ok, well, since the issue has been resolved and this thread is slowly turning into a 70s stand up comedy routine about how cr*zy women are, perhaps a mod should close the thread?


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#30 Fairy Tail Fantard

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Posted 29 November 2014 - 01:46 AM

You didn't do anything wrong from what I can see. If she told you to go away, then she has no right to really judge you for doing what she wanted you to do. Sounds like she was a real catch. 

 

You're probably over it by now, but here's something you should read:

 

http://www.theblaze....-relationships/

 

"Ladies, it's time to take responsibility for your failed relationships" is something I think everybody should read. If your woman thinks you're not good enough for her, then you might wanna check this out.

 

Who cares about relationships anyway? It's like giving a large portion of your freedom away.


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#31 Mus1cLov3r

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Posted 29 November 2014 - 08:52 PM

You didn't do anything wrong from what I can see. If she told you to go away, then she has no right to really judge you for doing what she wanted you to do. Sounds like she was a real catch. 
 
You're probably over it by now, but here's something you should read:
 
http://www.theblaze....-relationships/
 
"Ladies, it's time to take responsibility for your failed relationships" is something I think everybody should read. If your woman thinks you're not good enough for her, then you might wanna check this out.
 
Who cares about relationships anyway? It's like giving a large portion of your freedom away.

Good read...
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#32 Narufan85

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Posted 01 December 2014 - 02:41 AM

 

Who cares about relationships anyway? It's like giving a large portion of your freedom away.

 

Maybe in bad relationships.



#33 Fairy Tail Fantard

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Posted 04 December 2014 - 04:33 PM

 

Maybe in bad relationships.

I've had three girlfriends in the past who thought they could dictate my life by telling me to stop doing what I liked to do. One of them even told me to give up on getting my pilot's license. Think we're still together? Nope. I have my license, I can fly any single engine aircraft anywhere I please in the United States, and I'm now studying twin engine aircraft.  


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#34 Ace of Circle

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Posted 09 December 2014 - 11:23 AM

Ok everyone's saying that he did heaps wrong but I don't agree just point out what he did wrong and maybe I'll believe you but all the reasons stated beforehand don't warrant a reaction like that, everything wrong?Don't just give that half-assed answer at least say what he supposedly did wrong.

 

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