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"Because Tsunade-sama sent us."
Naruto grumbled. "I mean what are we doing here?!"
"Then that's what you should have asked," Sakura said primly. "We're going to an awards show."
"An awards show?! Alright!" shouted Naruto. "What did we win?"
"We didn't win anything Naruto. We're the guest presenters."
"Ah, man. Why do I, I mean we," he quickly amended glancing at Sakura, "always get stuck on these lame missions? We deserve something more appropriate for our talents!"
"Is there going to be food?" Naruto added.
"I don't know," Sakura said in some exasperation at her teammate's all-too familiar antics. "Tsunade-sama said that we were the best-suited for the job. We're going to Heaven & Earth forums and apparently, they're big fans of us."
"Yesss!! We have fans," exulted Naruto. "So what's the Heaven & Earth about?"
"Don't you remember anything Iruka taught you? It probably has something to do them being complementary elements. One is weak where the other is strong and vice versa. So both are necessary for success. Now, be quiet for a moment so I can read over the mission briefing. Tsunade-sama didn't say much about it when she handed it to me and told me that we should read it when we get here."
Sakura opened the scroll and began to read while Naruto strained to catch a glimpse over her shoulder. Sakura suddenly gasped. "Naruto ...," she said in a strained voice. "They aren't just fans of us. They're fans of us."
"I don't understand."
Sakura struggled to stay calm. "They think that we should be ... y'know ..." she tailed off helplessly. Looking at Naruto's still-uncomprehending gaze, she swallowed and then wiggled her pinkie.
"Oh," said Naruto. "Oh!"
"These people really are awesome! All of them?"
"Pretty much."
Picking up on Sakura's facial tic and other subtle signs that he was about to get a pounding, Naruto strove to swallow his glee and the grin that was threatening to take over his face. "So ... uh ... did it say whether there was going to be food?"
"Probably not. The award show is going to be done by tape-delay," Sakura answered, sparing him the beating.
"Aw, that's too bad," Naruto said, not sounding very disappointed. "So it's just us and this camera?"
"Yeah," she responded, not fooled in the slightest. "And it says the entries are in these other two scrolls here."
"Well, we should look at them right? So we know what we're talking about when we give out the awards?" Naruto said hopefully.
"As luck would have it," Sakura spat out. "Those are also part of the mission orders."
"Alright! I take back everything I said about the old hag!"
"Na-ru-to!"
.............................................
"Ok Naruto, I'm about to turn on the camera. Are you ready?"
"Yeah, but you're not up here."
"We'll edit out the beginning so the show starts when we're both up here."
*brief pause*
"Hi, I'm Haruno Sakura."
"And I'm Uzumaki Naruto, Hokage-to-be!" he virtually shouted at the camera.
"And we're both ... very happy to be here to announce the awards for the Great Heaven & Earth Fanart and Fanfiction Contest," Sakura continued with a slightly strained smile. Beside her, Naruto beamed.
"For third place ... in the fanart portion of the competition ... the winner is," Sakura paused dramatically. "Holiday! By Eva_Angel!"
"I liked that picture," Naruto piped up. "You look really good in green." Naruto was suddenly worried. "Not that you don't look good in red. I just meant that it'd be good as a change every now and then."
"I'm not taking fashion advice from a ninja that dresses in orange," Sakura retorted. But a small smile stayed on her lips.
"I was just saying that you looked good in that picture. So aren't you supposed to tell them what they won?"
"We don't know what they won. They get to pick the prizes."
"Oh. So what's the next award?"
"It's the third place fanfiction." She cleared her throat.
"Hey wait! Are you going to get to give out all the awards?"
"Yes. You wouldn't be able to pull it off with the proper degree of showmanship?"
"Are you saying that I wouldn't be good at playing to an audience? That's all I did in school!"
"Exactly."
"..."
"And now, the third place for best fanfiction goes to ..." Another dramatic pause. "12 Days of Christmas by Miss Soupy!"
"Hey, I liked that one!" Naruto commented. "Even though I wasn't in it much, I was all, like sensitive and stuff. And perceptive, too!"
"I may not have done well in school," he continued as Sakura muffled a snort. "But I'm smarter than I look."
"You'd almost have to be," she answered.
"Yup ... Hey!"
Sakura was unable to to restrain her chortle at the offended expression Naruto wore.
"Hey, you were the one that was confused the whole time in that story."
"It's a fanfiction, Naruto. It didn't really happen. So it's just the imaginary you that's smarter than the imaginary me."
Naruto muttered something under his breath.
"Ok, ok. We'll get back to the next award now."
"The second place award for best fanart goes to ... Family by DocDestructo!"
"Oh, I remember that one ... They ... looked so peaceful and happy together."
Noting the distant look in Naruto's eyes, Sakura put her arm around his waist. "Yeah, they did." They stood like that quietly for a few moments while Naruto was lost between his memories and dreams. Then Naruto snapped back to the moment.
"Sorry, did I mess up the show?"
"Don't worry. We can just cut that part out later."
"So the next award is for second place fanfiction, right?"
"I'm getting to it."
Sakura cleared her throat. "The second place award for best fanfiction in the Great Heaven and Earth Fanart and Fanfiction Contest II: Holiday Edition," she paused to catch her breath. "What a mouthful," she said under her breath. "Goes to Seduce My Wife! by DocDestructo!"
"That was a weird one. Why did you choose Sasuke to begin with?" questioned Naruto.
"Fan-fiction, Naruto."
"But I guess I can see Sasuke overlooking what a great thing he had. He already left you once. When he left us, I mean." Seeing the stricken look on her face, he realized what he'd just said. "But we'll get him back, Sakura! We have to. Promise of a lifetime," he continued, trying gamely to keep a cheerful look on his own face.
They held each other for a few moments.
"I wonder if Ero-sennin is going to write that story then."
"Naruto. I said that it's fiction. Not real life."
"But that's what Ero-sennin writes, too. What's to stop him from writing a story based on that story?"
Sakura blanched. "He ... wouldn't."
"Don't worry, Sakura. We have the only copy now, don't we? So we just keep that from him and it'll be ok," Naruto attempted to comfort her. "Well, except for the copy on the internet that this group read. But he'd have to get on the internet for that and he's too wrapped up in his 'research'. What would be on the internet that he'd be interested in?"
Sakura breathed a sigh of relief, but there was a nagging doubt in the back of her mind. Brushing it aside, she began with the next award. "And finally for first place, in the fanart portion of the contest, is Mistletoe by DocDestructo."
"Oh, yeah! That picture was great! Um, so why were you standing under that plant?"
"Once again Naruto, these are made up. So I wasn't actually standing there. It's just a drawing of me. And that plant is mistletoe, like the title of the fanart."
"So what's mistletoe?"
Long sigh. "Mistletoe is a parasitic plant that lives on trees, dependent on them for water and minerals that it can't get from photosynthesis. Its berries are poisonous when ingested .... eaten," she clarified to his puzzled gaze. "Its leaves stay green in the winter while the deciduous trees that it lives on loses theirs making it especially noticeable in winter."
"And there's a custom that you're supposed to kiss the person under it," she completed.
"Oh, I get it then," exclaimed Naruto. "Oh, wait. So why were you standing under it?"
"Nevermind. Let's move on to the last prize so we can go home, Naruto."
"For first place ... in the fanfiction portion of the contest ... is Full Bloom by random1377!"
"That was a really interesting story, Sakura. I never knew that about your hair."
"It's just a story, Naruto. He just made that part up for the story. Come on, you've seen my mom. Her hair's not red and I promise you that she and my dad are in love."
"No I haven't. I've never seen your family, Sakura."
"Nobody's seen your family! I've asked Ino, Shikamaru, Lee ... everyone. Nobody ever remembers seeing them."
"Well, I guess mom does kinda stay at home a bit," she said reflectively. "And dad has to travel."
"Well, that's that for the contest then. Congratulations to all the winners!"
"Yeah," added Naruto. "And thanks for all the submissions! They were great!" He cast a puzzled look at Sakura. "What?"
"Nothing. Let's get back to home."
...................................................
"So, do you wanna go out on a date sometime, Sakura?"
"We don't have time to be thinking about dates, Naruto. We have to get Sasuke back."
"But it's on the way!"
"How is it on the way? We still don't even know where Sasuke is?"
"So we don't know it's not on the way."
"We need to be training."
"That's a part of training. We gotta keep our strength up. And you haven't been eating enough. You're getting almost as skinny as Ino."
"Na-ru-to ..." began Sakura, her facial tic going into overdrive.
"What? Ino's just too skinny," Naruto attempted to explain. "She's lots skinnier than Granny Tsunade and everybody says that she's beautiful."
"Fine," Sakura subsided. "And now, I'm getting nutritional advice from somebody that eats only ramen."
"Alright!"
"No, not to that ..." attempted Sakura.
Naruto darted into the woods for a moment. "Look what I found, Sakura!"
"That's holly."
...
"Look at this!"
"That's poison ivy."
And so went the remainder of their trip back to Konoha.
To recap so you don't have to read through the whole thing again to try and remember the winners.
Fanart:
3rd: Holiday by Eva_Angel
2nd: Family by DocDestructo
1st: Mistletoe by DocDestructo
Fanfics:
3rd: 12 Days of Christmas by Miss Soupy
2nd: Seduce My Wife! by DocDestructo
1st: Full Bloom by random1377
And y'know ... it's ok to post on this thread.
i want to say i wasnt expecting this XDD... but great...
