Well, I finally got around to updating this thread! Anywho, here's the NaruTsu drabble that True had requested awhile back! It's full of lulz...at least I hope there lulz. Kind of takes place in a post-Danzou-as-Hokage world...anyway, enjoy! I'll try and get that
one out...though it's...July now...hm. I'll think of something. :/
Tsunade had a feeling it was going to be an off day when Naruto came into her office without his initial 'Hey, Baa-chan!'. Sure...she wasn't Hokage anymore, but he still made his regular visits to her office just down the hall from Kakashi's main chamber.
“...hello, Tsunade-sama...”
Yep, something was wrong in the world today. Naruto was showing her formality.
“What's wrong, Naruto?”
Naruto, newly promoted ANBU after showing his prowess in ninjutsu when he fought Pain, restored peace after the civil war between Danzou and his dissenters (which was pretty much everyone who wasn't a mindless follower), and had brought about a new peace between the five nations in the recent meeting between the five Kages, looked to her and shrugged, “Eh...it's been a crappy day.”
“How so?”
Naruto rolled his eyes, “Well, first off, Sai decided to cancel training today, and then Ino and Tenten had a separate mission to take care of, so Shino and I had no reason for any ANBU missions today...” Naruto paused for a moment, “Oh, Sakura pretty much denied me a date...again.”
Ah, now she was getting somewhere, “Well, you have any clue as to why?”
“Well...” Naruto scratched the back of his head, “I...kind of got her mad when I said that she was being too bossy because I didn't want to go to my scheduled physical today. She's been on my back about that for weeks now. Apparently being in ANBU means they keep better track of your health. Hell, if I knew that I would have signed up for the Hunter-nin squad. At least they get to leave for missions that are months long...”
“Naruto, she's just concerned about your health. If you go and treat her like that when she tries to help, then of course she's-”
“I'm not a kid anymore, Baa-chan! I'm seventeen going on eighteen in two months, damn it! I don't need her holding my hand all the time! Geesh, why is everyone suddenly trying to show me attention that I didn't get when I was young? So what if I'm the son of Minato Namikaze??!” Naruto growled a bit before taking in a deep breath, “...sorry...it's been a rough month. Kakashi-sensei has been watching Ame's movements like a hawk lately, and well...I've been his main guy for taking out any threats. What with my connections with Konan and all that.”
“How has she been, lately?”
The blond ANBU grunted, “She's fine. She's gaining more support from the Ame-nin, but she still has a lot of problems with maintaining order. Thankfully Konoha's helping her...you know she's made three orphanages in Rain Country within the last two years? I swear, the woman is a saint in disguise...”
Tsunade laughed a bit, “I suppose the so-called 'Amekage' of Amegakure needs to be caring enough to help that place.” Tsunade smiled to the young ANBU, “Are you busy right now?”
“Nope. Kakashi-sensei's given me a mandatory two week break, starting tomorrow. It's going to suck, since now I won't have my usual spars with Sakura since she's angry. I'll have to keep busy with seal-making or something...”
“Want to go out for a drink?”
Naruto slowly turned his head while simultaneously raising a blond eyebrow, “Come again?”
“A drink. You're over sixteen, and that means you're old enough to hit the bars in Konoha. I'm bored, I don't have any medical documents to take care of, and Shizune's off for the night. Come on, it'll be fun.”
“Baa-chan, seriously, you know I don't-”
Tsunade got up from her spot while dragging Naruto with her out the door, “Too bad, you're an ANBU; you'll have to get used to the alcohol sometime or another.”
- - - - -
Naruto walked into one of the quieter bars with a hand covering his reddened face, “Baa-chan, you don't need to do this. I'm not that desperate for-”
A well-manicured finger flicked Naruto on the forehead, luckily Tsunade had held back her strength. Naruto was currently being accompanied by Tsunade in an eighteen year-old henge, holding him by the arm while smiling cheekily, “Oh, come on. I haven't been able to let loose in awhile. Besides, I want to see the other guys around here get jealous...”
“...jealous?”
Tsunade planted a light kiss on Naruto's cheek, causing the ANBU to jump a bit at the contact. Tsunade grinned while her teenage body bounced happily on it's heels while laughing, “Hehehe, wow, I'm surprised you haven't been jumped by any of the kunoichi yet. You're too cute with that boyish charm of yours.”
Naruto gave Tsunade a flat look, “Baa-chan, stop it. You're scaring me.”
Tsunade gave a childish pout, “Hey, I'm not a grandma! I'm eighteen years old! Call me Tsunade-chan, if anything.”
“...Tsunade-chan, stop it.”
Tsunade giggled a bit more while whispering into his ear, “Loosen up, Naruto. Being in ANBU has made you uptight. Just be yourself for tonight.”
Naruto sighed, “Fine. Just don't...go and be too crazy...”
Tsunade glomped Naruto while laughing, “There we go! Come on, it's half-price drinks for the next hour!”
- - - - -
“Wait, so you mean Kirabi tried hooking you up with Karui? Oh...this is too rich...”
Naruto waved a hand dismissively, “Yeah, yeah, I stopped in Kumo during one of my political missions to accompany Kakashi-sensei. You know, it seemed weird at the start, but...”
Tsunade smirked, noticing that Naruto had become much more loose-lipped and talkative after his first half hour in the bar, “Go on...”
“Well, Karui isn't as mean as she acts! We went out to the local festival, and had a great time...though I think I had abandoned guard duty...well, what Kakashi-sensei doesn't know doesn't hurt him. In the end Karui and I decided to just stay friends. She's one of my contacts in the spy network now.”
“Don't you think you should be quiet about that stuff?” Tsunade laughed, noting Naruto filling his third glass.
“Bah! Karui's tough, she can take whatever someone throws at her! She's not bad with a sword either! A lot better than me...but I can beat her in ninjutsu no problem! Hey! You ever hear about the time Sakura and I had a chakra tree-climbing match between Omoi and Karui?”
Another chuckle escaped Tsunade's lips, “No, I haven't, but I have a feeling I will. Go ahead and tell me.”
- - - - -
“...an...an' so I said to the Mizukage, 'Hell no 'm going into that swamp! Den Shino goes an' says we have to anyways 'cause the rouge-nin is in 'der! It sucked! That crazy Mizukage woman kept staring at me! I thin' she would have done me right 'den and there if...hey, stop laughin'!”
Tsunade couldn't help but laugh, listening to Naruto's slightly drunken rant about his recent trip to Kirigakure, “Sorry, sorry...it's just funny hearing that you've captured the interest of the Rain Village's leader. I have to admit, Naruto, you've become quiet a charmer since you joined ANBU.” Tsunade herself was sporting a light tinge in her cheeks, but was much better at holding her alcohol compared to Naruto, “Hey, weren't you sayin' something about Tenten earlier?”
Naruto blinked a bit while scratching his cheek, “Um...oh! Yeah, me an' her hadta go on an espionage mission, and part of it was disguisin' ourselves as a young couple. She really played the role right...hell she even gave me tongue more than once when she was 'acting'.” Naruto shook his head, “It wasn't that bad though. She's hot.”
“Hahahahaha!!” Tsunade felt tears pricking the corners of her eyes while laughing at Naruto's bluntness, “Naruto, honey, I think we should lay off the sake for a while...”
“Yeah, probably. The table won't stop swaying...” Naruto mumbled, pushing his cup away, “Damn, how can you handle this stuff?”
“It's not so bad...Naruto, you okay?”
“Yeah, just...aw crap...” Naruto groaned, “I think the last few are finally hitting me.”
Tsunade gave a small smile, “Alright. I have some remedies at home that can help break down the sake in your body a bit at my place. Come on, I'll help you.”
Naruto was a bit embarrassed when a teenage Tsunade practically carried him out bridal style before he protested saying he was able to walk. Needless to say, they got home without incident from the younger blond.
“Here,” Tsunade said, handing Naruto a small glass filled with a dark green liquid, “It's bitter, but it's the best thing for breaking down the alcohol in your system right now. You may have the runs later on though...though that's only happened with Jiraiya, so hopefully you won't have the same thing happen.”
Naruto took the glass and downed it quickly, biting back the gag reflex as he swallowed, “Ugh, good lord, what the hell is in that?” He coughed a bit before sitting down in a chair, “I feel like I just swallowed a glass of metal polish from Tenten's gear bag. Gah!!”
Tsunade snickered a bit while sitting by Naruto, “You'll have to thank Shizune for that remedy. It's better than the one Sakura made, but Sakura's at least tastes better.”
“Eh...whatever...” Naruto looked to Tsunade before grinning, “You know, Baa-chan, you make me wish I had been born 'round the same time as ya with the way ya looked...heheh...”
Tsunade didn't fool herself; Naruto was drunk. Not fully hammered, but he smelled faintly of the rice alcohol, “Naruto, you're in love with the image, not the woman.” She rolled her eyes and patted his cheek affectionately, “You can sleep here on the couch tonight, okay?”
Naruto shook his head, “No, I meanit! Honest! If you'd be younger, or I'd be older...” Naruto blushed, “You'ra lot more fun than some of the women my age...”
“Heh, you know how to make an old woman blush, Naruto.” She kissed his cheek, “However, it won't get you any closer to getting anything with me.”
“Fine, fine...it was worth a try...”
Tsunade actually felt her eyebrows rise up a bit, “You honestly were trying to hit on me?”
Naruto mumbled something incoherent while shrugging his shoulders, though she made out a few words like, still sexy and it'd be interesting. Tsunade felt her lips curl as she broke out into more laughter.
“Okay, hunk, you get one kiss from me then. That's it though. I'm old enough to be your grandmother.”
Naruto grinned, “Fair enough.”
The younger shinobi seized the moment by grabbing Tsunade around the waist and back, spinning her around so that he was holding her up while she looked up at him. He slowly locked lips with her, and Tsunade, despite her mind telling her that this was taboo, gave a quiet sigh while closing her eyes a bit and gripping Naruto's ANBU gear, wrapped up in the moment.
Naruto pulled away, and smiled that ever-charming smile of his, “So?”
Tsunade's face was flushed red as she tried to catch her breath. Damn...that brat was still single???
“I'm going to have a talk with Sakura tomorrow about how stupid she is to not snatch you up while she still can.” Tsunade replied. Naruto just laughed while pulling the former Godaime up and then flopping on the couch face first while Tsunade just smiled.
“Alright, Naruto, you have anything to take care of in the morning?”
Naruto waved a hand, “Nah, just afternoon training with Konohamaru.”
“I'll let you sleep in then. Good night, Naruto.” Tsunade spoke as she turned off the light.
“G'night, Baa-chan.” Naruto spoke, having rolled over on his side and already dozing off.
- - - - -
Tsunade lie in her bed, having released her henge to her original appearance, looking up at the ceiling as she smiled a bit. She enjoyed tonight; Naruto had treated not as an elder or former Hokage. He treated her like a woman, like a friend. Okay, so he still said 'Baa-chan', but that was just Naruto. Once he gave you a name, it stuck with you. She couldn't remember the last time she had so much fun with a man.
Probably with Dan...or maybe Jiraiya. She couldn't recall, but it had been too long. She already knew that Naruto had taken Jiraiya's more cultured lessons in wooing the fairer gender to heart. He was a rather smooth talker too.
“So that's why Kakashi always sends him on the recon missions into Otogakure...” she murmured. A man with charm is more likely to get information when needed.
With that in mind, she closed her eyes with a yawn, and began to fall asleep as well. Yes, she'd definitely have to tell Sakura to take Naruto before it was too late. Heck, she was pretty sure that Sakura was already more or less in love with the boy, and Naruto was too much of a gentleman to try and push their relationship along faster than Sakura wanted.
Naruto may have been out of her area for dating, but that didn't mean she couldn't help her former apprentice take the boy.
Besides, Tsunade always wondered what it would be like to have blond and pink haired grandchildren...