"I spy with my large, unsightly, pale eyes that make it look like I should be blind, but I'm really not because these eyes are super powerful and can see through anything, a Naruto that is in love with someone else, so I think I'll force myself on him by murdering my cousin. It will probably ruin his character, and pinky's, but I don't care because I will accomplish my dreams, because I am the only one that matters."
...
Hinata's diary entry:
"Dear Diary,
today I went on my first date with Naruto-kun! After years of stalking and hiding behind trees, I've finally became Naruto-kun's girlfriend!
When we were about to decide what we should eat for lunch, I've noticed how Naruto-kun was hesitating with the prices. To show all my Otaku and NH fans how great of a girlfriend I am, I used my Byakugan to look through Naruto-kun's bag and realized that he was broke. I suggested to go Ichiraku with him in a sweet and angelic-like voice, while making Sakura look like a b*tch who never once cared about the fact that my boyfriend was broke.
I never would have reached my goal if it wasn't for Neji-nii-sama's noble sacrifice. I'll make sure that my little sister will carry a photo of him during mine and Naruto-kun's wedding!"