I tend to stay away from killing off established characters unless I have a very good reason for it.
So, if I was writing this story, I would opt to come up with a problem that removes Jiraiya's influence on the council. There are multiple ways for you to accomplish this. A few ideas are:
You could use his love of women against him.
Place Naruto in danger.
Protecting Tsunade's Image ( She loves to drink and gamble )
Atsukai.
Orochimaru.
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#73246 help needed
Posted by
on 24 July 2006 - 10:25 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
#72745 Bad Writer's block
Posted by
on 21 July 2006 - 06:21 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
I haven't read your story, so I cannot give you advice on that.
But, if you look through some my previous posts in this thread, they might give you some ideas how to help with writer's block.
But, if you look through some my previous posts in this thread, they might give you some ideas how to help with writer's block.
#72588 Fanfiction Depression
Posted by
on 20 July 2006 - 08:52 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
QUOTE
What really gets me though is the whole concern over popularity. Sure I can go to my stats page and see that my story's been accessed so many times, and reviewed so many times, but that's not what keeps me writing. If you write, for god's sake do it for yourself. None of us are professionals (Well, the majority certainly aren't), we don't write for money, there are no publishers breathing down our back, yet for some reason we act like we have all those problems and more. By forcing yourself to write stuff for others you are taking much enjoyment out of the activity.
Very true; you expanded on what my initial message was very well.
#72556 Fanfiction Depression
Posted by
on 20 July 2006 - 07:30 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
Depends on the reviews. If you have a review that says, "Hey, awesome story," while those are nice to get, they do not help the writer. Critiquing a writer's work is a little more involved. Point out what parts you liked in the story as well as the parts you didn't like. The best way to do this is print out the story and add your remarks as you read. That way it's fresh in your mind as you read.
10 of that type of review is worth a 1000 awesome story reviews.
10 of that type of review is worth a 1000 awesome story reviews.
#72490 Bound With A Kiss
Posted by
on 20 July 2006 - 05:08 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
#72392 Narusaku fanfiction need comments for the summery
Posted by
on 20 July 2006 - 04:56 AM
in
Writing Discussion
I've seen it called both ways. 
#72311 Narusaku fanfiction need comments for the summery
Posted by
on 19 July 2006 - 10:33 PM
in
Writing Discussion
QUOTE
Ever since Sasuke and Naruto left, Sakura's has been having these horrible nightmares. But what if, one day, a familiar blond kid appears? Whenever Naruto comes close to her, they both get this weird feeling. Naruto has been away from women so long, he can't talk to Sakura like he did when he was a child. And what happens when Sakura starts to have some feelings for him? (credits to adrianna for correcting me)
First off, these are my comments. Feel free to use my advice or ignore it.
If this is a summary, you shouldn't have questions for the reader. While stories should naturally have questions, you shouldn't force the reader to come to his own conclusion with your open-ended questions in a summary. Having questions for yourself is fine. Also, I would stay away from using what if so-and-so did this or this event happened.
Also, it sounds like Sakura is the main character of the story, but you gave Naruto a problem ( he cannot talk to Sakura has he did in the past ). I would leave that out unless you make him the main character. Also, you should write your story in Limited Omnipotent. Unlimited Omnipotent becomes to messy in my opinion. The only way to can get around the unlimited issue is having different Point of View chapters. One chapter you have Sakura's PoV, and the next chapter you have Naruto's.
Try to limit your summary to sentence or two.
Things you want to ask yourseif.
What is the theme of your story?
What is Sakura's problem or what does she want? ( Conflict )
What is standing in her way? ( Antagonist )
How will she solve her problem? ( Climax / Resolution )
Going through your summary:
Ever since Sasuke and Naruto left, Sakura's has been having these horrible nightmares.
What is the meaning behind the nightmares? Does these nightmares lead to something else? Possible catalyst to her conflict?
But what if, one day, a familiar blond kid appears?
I would reword this to something like: One day a familar spikey, golden haired kid appeared on the streets of Konoha.
But, so what Naruto appeared?
Whenever Naruto comes close to her, they both get this weird feeling.
As I said before, be careful with Point of View. If you want to show that both characters have this weird feeling, you need to separate them into different chapters.
Naruto has been away from women so long, he can't talk to Sakura like he did when he was a child.
Your story is about Sakura. Doesn't matter if Naruto was gone for a day or three years. I would remove this.
And what happens when Sakura starts to have some feelings for him?
I would reform this into a sentence and not a question. This is what your story should be trying to answer. Is this what Sakura wants? For Naruto to love her. If that is the case, what is standing in her way? Her feelings for Sasuke. How will she solve her problem? Say goodbye to Sasuke.
#72288 Drabble Challenge
Posted by
on 19 July 2006 - 09:33 PM
in
Challenges
#72185 Love Triangles
Posted by
on 19 July 2006 - 06:58 AM
in
Writing Discussion
No Problem. Good luck with your story.
#72128 Love Triangles
Posted by
on 19 July 2006 - 12:34 AM
in
Writing Discussion
From what you described, it sounds like your story is more of a novel than a short story.
If I was working on this story I would do the following.
First, I would have the scenes only span a few days.
Two, while having Tsunade and Jiraiya bet, that isn't the point of the story. You need a theme. If Naruto is the main character of your story, then you need to give him something, something that he wants or a problem. Primal issues are usually the best. Ask yourself these questions: What does he want? What is standing in his way? How is he going to get it?
Three, you want to start your story as near to the climax as possible because this is a short story. You do not have a lot of time for exposition.
Four, limit your characters. The more characters you have the more deminsions your story has. List your characters and look to see if you truly need them.
If I was working on this story I would do the following.
First, I would have the scenes only span a few days.
Two, while having Tsunade and Jiraiya bet, that isn't the point of the story. You need a theme. If Naruto is the main character of your story, then you need to give him something, something that he wants or a problem. Primal issues are usually the best. Ask yourself these questions: What does he want? What is standing in his way? How is he going to get it?
Three, you want to start your story as near to the climax as possible because this is a short story. You do not have a lot of time for exposition.
Four, limit your characters. The more characters you have the more deminsions your story has. List your characters and look to see if you truly need them.
#71301 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 14 July 2006 - 06:27 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE (Pite @ Jul 14 2006, 10:21 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You know that in the Naruto: Ultimate Ninja the guide book there is a chart of who'swho and did you know that there is NO line connectinbg Naruto and Hinata togatherr but between Sakura and Naruto is a line called crush or something like that.
You mean the game guide book for the video game?
#70769 What are you listening to?
Posted by
on 11 July 2006 - 09:55 PM
in
Fun Cafe
Good to see a few Snow Patrol fans here.
#70134 Bad Writer's block
Posted by
on 08 July 2006 - 06:08 AM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
The main thing is for you to be consistant. The most important part is to really take an hour out of your schedule everyday and write. Doesn't matter if it's about your story, your day, or whatever. Just get in the habit of writing.
#70063 Aishteru Naruto: I Love You
Posted by
on 08 July 2006 - 12:03 AM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
QUOTE (MonkeysTotallyRock @ Jul 7 2006, 05:01 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
editing is for chumps! down with edititing, i say! ''^^ j.k. nice job. i like it.
Actually, proofing is one of the most important parts of the writing process. *lol*
#70004 Bad Writer's block
Posted by
on 07 July 2006 - 09:17 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
Well, you can publish it on your website, one of the many free sites that specialize in fiction, or you can find an online publishing house, there are a few, if you want to acutally get your work published. This will take capital, and I think it will cost you around 500-1000 dollars.
Another route you can go is magazines. They usually have a submission process in which you can mail in your stories. There is a book that is published each year that lists all the magazines that allow submissions as well as another informational tid-bits. The book is located: http://www.amazon.co...glance&n=283155
Another route you can go is magazines. They usually have a submission process in which you can mail in your stories. There is a book that is published each year that lists all the magazines that allow submissions as well as another informational tid-bits. The book is located: http://www.amazon.co...glance&n=283155
#69779 What are you listening to?
Posted by
on 07 July 2006 - 03:48 AM
in
Fun Cafe
Been listening to the new Snow Patrol CD as well as the new Pearl Jam CD.
#69628 Bad Writer's block
Posted by
on 06 July 2006 - 09:35 PM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
QUOTE (Vespar @ Jul 5 2006, 04:15 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hey! That's some good advice, Zahrn!
I got to ask you though, do you set yourself a plan about how you want your fic to turn out?
I got to ask you though, do you set yourself a plan about how you want your fic to turn out?
For the most part, I know how my storties begin and end. It's the middle that I usually write as I go.
This is usually how I start a story.
1. The idea pops in my head, and I write down whatever comes to mind in my journal. If I see there is enough for a story, then I work on the plot.
2. Plot: I summarize the plot of the story. I ask myself a few questions. Who is the main character? What does he want? Who is standing in his way of getting it?
3. Once I have my plot, I start with the outline. It's a simple outline in which I write out each scene that I came up with so far as a sentence. Having an outline is good because you can move scenes around if you feel they are out of order or completing remove them if they don't flow with your story.
4. Once I completed my outline, I start to write. Sometimes I write the ending first. There isn't any logic for me on where to start. If something comes to mind, I just open my journal and write it down. Usually my first pass isn't that descriptive, it's more of a brainstorming session, giving the outline more depth and life.
5. Once you have a completed story, I proof read it. Correcting all spelling and grammar mistakes. I make notes if I feel a scene isn't fully developed, feels akward, or doesn't work as I intended it to be. This goes for characters as well.
6. After proof reading and correcting any mistakes, I go through step 5 again.
7. I usually give the story a title, and I "publish" it for people to review and/or read for enjoyment.
#68415 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 29 June 2006 - 07:42 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE
I go with nejihina being more likely, the hyuugas are really anal about keepin the blood in.
Exactly. Which is why I came to the conclusion long ago that Hinata and Naruto could never be an item. This assuming that Naruto liked Hinata in that manner, and Hinata stops with all the fainting, blushing, and studdering around Naruto.
#68134 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 28 June 2006 - 05:50 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE (Random Nobody @ Jun 28 2006, 10:45 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I actually hadn't considered that by reviving his clan he just meant restoring their honor. It also seems he's lost most of his intrest in his clan anyway, which is probably why the Uchiha symbol on his Part II outfit is so small compared to his old outfit.
I made a comment about his clan symbol in another post. I think this is a good thing. If he was only interested in power, why would he care at all about his clan symbol?
#67875 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 07:55 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE
If the "sexy water episode" is the one I am thinking of, I have a question. Did Naruto even figure out it was her?
No, he did not. When he was talking about his experience to Kiba and Shino, Hinata was instantly embarassed because she knew Naruto was talking about her.
#67862 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 07:04 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
*shrugs* I guess the writers like Hinata then. I don't pay that much attention to character polls.
#67833 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 04:58 PM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE (Random Nobody @ Jun 27 2006, 04:56 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE
Nawh, she isn't bad in the fillers. I loved the episode in which she was practicing in the water when Naruto stumbled upon her. That cracked me up.
You saw a little more of her character in Episode 190. Then again, the fillers mean squat for character.
You saw a little more of her character in Episode 190. Then again, the fillers mean squat for character.
Didn't the fillers make Hinata so obsessed with Naruto that she made food that looked like him? Oh and I'd probably appreciate the humor of that Water Practice scene if I didn't lurk on NarutoFan and see all the Hinatards that went on about how sexy she was, and how they wished they were in Naruto so they could have sex with her. Plus she's twelve so that scene was kinda creepy.
Yeah, there was an Arc that had Hinita cook riceballs that looked like Naruto. *lol* It was corny, but I was entertained. These days it doesn't take much for me to laugh like a hyena.
QUOTE
The way they try to develop her character in the fillers is what I hate. And that every arc she is in the writers have to squeeze in some crappy exscuse for NaruHina.
Writers don't write things out of the blue. Okay, sometimes they do, but usually there is a meaning. I bet there was some research done, and they found that most people liked Hinata. That is why she is in a bunch of the fillers.
#67828 What are you listening to?
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 04:53 PM
in
Fun Cafe
Lets see, my top three:
I've been in an 80s kick, and uploading these songs like crazy to my iPod.
Echo and the Bunnymen: Killing Moon
New Order: Blue Monday
Church: Under the Milky Way
I've been in an 80s kick, and uploading these songs like crazy to my iPod.
Echo and the Bunnymen: Killing Moon
New Order: Blue Monday
Church: Under the Milky Way
#67738 NaruIno
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 07:05 AM
in
The Library Coffee Shop
I was a craze like that with Rurouni Kenshin. I ended up writing two pieces of fan fiction because of it. One story about Kenshin before he got to Tokyo in the beginning of the series, and one story about Soujirou, the Ten-Ken, about ten years after their fight in Kyoto. I had a fun time writing them, and it showed me how little I truly knew of the RK-verse. *lol*
#67717 The Great NaruSaku Debate Thread!
Posted by
on 27 June 2006 - 06:13 AM
in
The Museum of NaruSaku
QUOTE (Random Nobody @ Jun 26 2006, 07:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
QUOTE
If I recall, she was worse off with fainting in Part II than she was in Part I.
I believe your right. As far as I can remember she has only fainted twice in the manga, once during Part I and once during Part II. She fainted in Part I when she went to see Naruto in the hospital after the Rescue Sasuke mission failed. Fainting her was understandable cause Hinata saw the person she idolized injured and covered with bandages. She fainted in Part II just because he was there. I know the Part II faint was probably just for comedic purposes but I can't help but be afraid that poor Hinata hasn't developed much in three years. Ah well, she's still better than Filler Hinata
Nawh, she isn't bad in the fillers. I loved the episode in which she was practicing in the water when Naruto stumbled upon her. That cracked me up.
You saw a little more of her character in Episode 190. Then again, the fillers mean squat for character.
